POSITIVE REINFORCEMENT: How to effectively encourage positive behaviors

POSITIVE REINFORCEMENT

Learning how to provide positive reinforcement for your child can help to create a more positive and ideal BEHAVIORS. Teaching your children that there are consequences for every action teaches them how to think and problem solve for themselves when they are out in the world.

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·         POSITIVE REINFORCEMENT- Simply means encouraging good behaviors

·         CONSEQUENCES- are the result of a behavior. (whether it was a positive or negative behavior)

·         BEHAVIORS- a person’s actions.  (What he or she does or says)

Think about these POSITIVE CONSEQUENCES (or incentives):

Work = Paycheck    

Sleep = Energy   

Medicine = Feeling Better  

Asking for Help = Receiving Help

Examples of POSITIVE REINFORCEMENT can be:

• High 5
• Encouragement
• Praise
• Hug
• Thumbs Up
• Clapping
• Cheering
• Privileges
• Rewards

(Privileges may include extra TV or electronics time, later bedtime, choosing what to eat for dinner, etc.)

*POSITIVE REINFORCEMENT may be the most effective

when provided immediately after a desired BEHAVIOR. *

Examples of BEHAVIORS to Reinforce Positively:

Using manners
Playing Quietly
Asking Permission
Chores
Playing nicely with others
Helping Others
Making an Effort or Trying
Following Directions Immediately

POSITIVE REINFORCEMENT can also be used when a child has not done something correctly. Giving the child praise for what they have done right is more encouraging than putting them down for “failure.”

Example: “I am proud of you for asking permission to eat candy.  Next time can you wait for mommy to finish speaking?”

Example: “I noticed that you picked up some of your toys in your room. I am proud of you for doing your chores.  I see another toy on the floor. Can we put that one with the others?”

Body Cues: ANGER

Use this activity to determine Body Cues in the child.  

Once the child has identified how their body feels when they are experiencing anger they can then begin to learn to start using their coping skills before it is too late.  

I typically allow my clients to list everything they can think of first. I sometimes then will present video clips of others being angry to help them determine what they may feel inside, and if the client is still unable to come up with body cues I provide examples and ask if they have felt that particular sensation before.

HAVE A HAPPY DAY

AYLA

Conversation Starters -Social Skills

              ~~ !!!!! SCHOOL'S BACK !!!!!~~

70 CONVERSATION STARTERs

Ever felt nervous when you first met someone, because you didn’t quite know what to say?  Here is a list of questions to get a good conversation started with a potential new friend. (Kids and teens may wish to practice on their family, friends, pets, counselors, social workers, or therapist, etc.)

    BE PREPARED to have to answer the questions yourself.

If you wish to be creative print out this list, cute each line into strips, ball them up and place them in a bag or box so that you will not know what question  is coming next

1.    Did you have a nickname? How did you get it?

2.  Do you do when you feel anxious? (I.e. nail biting, hair twirling, leg shaking, pacing, etc.)

3.  Do you have a hobby? What do you do in your free time?

4.  For you, what was the worst thing about being a (insert grade or year in school)?

5.  Have you ever committed a RAK? Random Act of Kindness? Explain…

6.  How often do you check your media outlets vine? Instagram? Pinterest? Kick? E-mail? Facebook? Texts?

7.  How would you describe your “style”?

8.  If one of your 5 senses could have supernatural abilities, which one sense would you choose?

9.  If you could be one age for the rest of your life, how old would you choose to be?

10.       If you could change one thing about your school, what would it be?

11.  If you could choose anyone name 2 people you would take on a road trip.

12.        If you could cure one type of disease, which one would you cure?

13.If you could design the perfect TV channel, what would be on it?

14.        If you could guest star on any Reality TV Show, which one would you choose?

15.        If you could have any animal in the world as a pet, what animal would you choose?

16.        If you could have any one super-power, which one would you choose and why?

17.  If you could invent a holiday, what and when would it be?

18.        If you could plan your own birthday part, what would you do?

19.        If you had $10 to spend, how would you spend it? $100? $1000?

20.     If you had a theme song (one that played every time you entered a room), which song would 

    you choose?

21.        If you had a YouTube channel what would you call it?

22.      If you had an unlimited gift card to any store, which store would it be?

23.      If you were stuck on Stranded Island, what are 2 things you would bring with you?

24.      Name 3 tv shows you have recorded on your DVR? Netflix? HULU?

25.      So far who has had the most positive influence on you?

26.     What are 3 qualities you want your friends to have?

27.      What are some positive changes you have seen in your life?

28.      What cartoon character do you most identify with?

29.      What do you plan to do when you graduate?

30.     What do you struggle with the most in life?

31.   What helps you to feel most content or peaceful?

32.      What is one gadget or electronic you’d like to own?

33.      What is one of the most adventurous things you’ve ever done?

34.      What is one regret you have from last week? Last Month? Last year? Your lifetime?

35.      What is one statement that you hope people will say about you when you are no longer    

     around?

36.      What is one thing you wish you had more time for in your life?

37.      What is one thing you’ve never done that you would really like to do?

38.      What is some place that you would really like to visit?

39.      What is something you are looking forward to doing within the next six months?

40.     What is something you like about yourself?

41.        What is the funniest thing that has happened to you recently?

42.      What is the most important thing that makes a friendship great?

43.      What is the most recent book you read?

44.      What is the scariest thing you’ve ever seen in real life?

45.      What is your earliest memory?

46.     What is your favorite animal?

47.      What is your favorite ice cream flavor and your favorite topping?

48.      What is your favorite thing to do with friends?

49.      What is your goal in life? Or goals?

50.     What is your least favorite chore to do?

51.         What is your most favorite possessions?

52.      What makes you feel discouraged or insecure?

53.      What one thing would you change about your house if you could?

54.      What songs are on your recently played playlist right now?

55.      What was the worst thing about being in middle school for you?

56.     What would you like for your life to be like 5 years from now? 10 years from now? 50years?

57.      What’s one thing that annoys you about your siblings or cousins?

58.      What’s one thing you like about your Mom?

59.      What’s one trait you admire about your Dad?

60.     What’s the biggest struggle you are facing in life right now?

61.        What’s the furthest place you’ve ever been from your current home?

62.     What’s the most annoying word or phrase your parents or teachers use often?

63.      What’s your dream car?

64.     When is something you must get from the grocery store, no matter what?

65.     When you are surprised with 30 free minutes during the day, how do you spend it?

66.     Where state and city were you born in?

67.      Who do you wish would listen more closely to you?

68.     Who is the most important person in your life?

69.     Who’s someone you admire/respect? Why? (not a family member)

70.     Your first job will be…?

I AM GRATEFUL FOR: Positive Thinking & Self Exploration Art Activity

Excuse the quality of this photo.  This activity allows for the participant to engage in identifying the things they can be grateful and thankful for.  It encourages positive self esteem, self image, gratitude, positive thinking, and humbleness.  (is that a word??)

1st: You can start the activity off for the participant by drawing a circle in the middle of the page and writing "I am grateful/thankful for..."

2nd: You can write down the topics (as identified by the participant) as though you are creating a start or flower petals out of words.  (refer to picture)  If they are unable to come up with enough things they are grateful for you may wish to provide examples.

If you end up providing examples keep in mind what the 

participant identified on their own vs your suggestions. 

**SOCIAL WORKERS/COUNSELORS:: And inability to identify positive things in life or things to be grateful for is something you may want to explore further if you are providing mental health services.
**PARENTS: If you are a parent you may wish to consult your child's PCP or mental health professional.

Topics may include but are not limited to:
STRENGTHS
MIND AND BODY
THIS MOMENT
LIFE
ANIMALS
LOVE AND PASSION
CREATIVITY
FRIENDSHIPS 
MEMORIES